Colorado is blue. Not purple. Even Lauren “Sassy Pants” Boebert’s race down south of us is too close to call at this moment.
Democratic Governor Jared Polis won reelection by more than 20 points over his opponent, Heidi “Furries are everywhere!” Ganahl. Democratic Senator Michael Bennet won his bid for a third term by nearly 20 points. His opponent, Joe “Middle of the Road” O’Dea thought if he talked trash about Donald Trump, he’d win in Colorado. He didn’t. Even that didn’t help him. Colorado’s new Congressional District CD7 went to Democrat Brittany Petterson by 17 points. Her opponent, Erik “Trump Won, We all KNOW it” Aadland is probably cleaning his gun glumly. The other new Congressional District CD8 has not been called, but the Democrat, Yadira Caraveo is leading Barbara “Democrats Legaized Fentanyl” Kirkmeyer. And, yes, even Lauren “Jesus Deliver us a Win” Boebert is behind her Democratic opponent, Adam Frisch at this moment. Sassy Pants did not expect this.
Here in Park County, it appears that maybe, just maybe, a little more than half the votes have been counted on the day after the election. That’s understandable and predictable. The Clerk and Recorder staff is tiny, and I’m sure the lunatic fringe who believe 2000 Mules are alive and well in the county is probably hovering with intimidation over the ballot stacks.
I suspect when everything is said, done, counted, and contested, the darling of the South Park Outsiders, Dave Wissel, will win the District 3 Commissioner contest. And, I’ll bet no new taxes are approved, including the Public Safety Initiative 1A. My suspicions are not based on anything other than the inescapable nature of the majority populace of Park County. If it were possible to bring back time to, oh, say, 1952, and layer it all across the county, nothing would appear out of place, it would all be as familiar as it is today.
The intra-party squabbles in the Park County Republican party were crystallized by this election cycle. The hard-right, “Trump Won, We all KNOW It”-Christian Nationalist-Conspiracy based-Bible based-Fear based-Lunacy based, Constitutional Conservative breast beaters and gun toters will probably prevail. The old-timey Republicans, you know, the ones who can at least see the other side of the aisle, will fade away. Or will they?
So, I’ll likely update the Park County races later. Once a couple of clerks counting the votes, and the lunatics hovering over them have their coffee and get back to work.
